Highs and Lows in Parenting

Whew, we had quite the day earlier this week. It started out completely normal… until we had an ambulance at our house.

Baby girl smiling while sitting in grass

Sadie was hanging out with me in our bathroom and fell backwards and hit her head. She falls all the time, so it wasn’t too big of a deal. She cried pretty hard, so I picked her up and snuggled her in my arms until she stopped.

About a minute or two later, I looked at her and she had blood coming out of her mouth. It was on her hand, her shirt, shorts, and face. I tried to check in her mouth to see where the blood was coming from but couldn’t find anything. I started freaking out and decided to call 911 because I wasn’t sure if she had a concussion or why she would be bleeding from her mouth after falling backwards.

The 911 dispatcher told me to call back if Sadie became unconscious and said an ambulance was on its way. Within a few minutes, we had a team of paramedics checking Sadie out and asking about what happened. They had me try and open her mouth and inside her upper lip we found a cut. I have never been more relieved for my child to be cut in my life!

The paramedics offered to take Sadie to the local children’s hospital but I declined since we had figured out she was bleeding from the cut in her mouth and not from a head injury, lol.

Sadie was playing on the kitchen floor while Jimmy and I were eating dinner that night and she stood up and took her first steps.

Baby girl smiling in shoe store

What a roller coaster of a day. I went from worrying that Sadie had a concussion to witnessing her first steps just hours later. If I’ve learned anything about parenting, it’s that the highs are higher and the lows are lower.

I would do anything to never have Sadie experience hurt–physically or emotionally. At the same time, I know that’s not realistic in this world and the trials of life develop our character. The lows of parenthood are tough. The highs, though? Wow. It’s amazing to watch this little being that God has blessed us with. We see her grow, learn, and develop right before our eyes and there’s nothing like it.

Just like God develops the character of our children through tough times, He develops their parents right along with ’em through all the highs and lows ‚̧

14 Weeks As A Mom

Sadie is officially 14 weeks old. A little more than a quarter of a year. How?! I last posted my thoughts on being a mom at the six week mark, and I’m back eight weeks later with more thoughts.

Loving Sadie is easy. Being a parent is (sometimes) hard. It’s a rewarding experience.

I still don’t feel like a mom. I feel like Sadie’s mom when someone besides me is holding her and she cries until she’s back in my arms. But feeling like an actual mom (<– whatever that means)? Not really!

I adore holding her soft little hands and her smile is my favorite.

Holding baby hand

I’m totally dreading ever having to discipline her. She’s just so cute, innocent, and sweet that I can’t imagine that day I have to enforce rules and boundaries with her.

I really enjoy connecting with other parents. It kind of feels like a club ūüôā

I’m learning to trust my instinct, but at the same time I have no idea what I’m doing.

It’s so much fun to see Sadie discover the world around her. Her joy brings me joy.

Three month old baby in jumper

Not knowing what to expect is hard. Every single day, I wake up not knowing what the day will bring. I’m sure we’ll settle into a routine as Sadie grows, but this type-A planner chick struggles with the unknown.

I’m learning to go with the flow. Along with my last point about not knowing what to expect, I’m learning that it’s much easier if I just surrender to what the day brings. When I try to force XYZ to happen, it just results in stress. It’s so much more freeing to say, “Well, I’d like to fold laundry and get groceries today, but I might be feeding Sadie all day because she’s going through a growth spurt and that’s okay.” I have to remind myself what’s most important and realize everything else can wait.

Being a family is so cool. I don’t know how else to put it. I love hanging out with Jimmy, Sadie, and the pets. I still can’t believe it’s all real sometimes. It feels like such a great blessing and responsibility from God. It’s very, very humbling!

Husband and wife kissing and holding baby family photo

In the first weeks of motherhood, I felt absolutely consumed by caring for our sweet girl. I thought I’d never get to do things like blog, watercolor, or bake again. The weight of caring for a baby felt (and still feels) heavy, but I am finding time here and there to enjoy my hobbies and passions. Taking time to do things the “old me” used to do feels so wonderful.

Breastfeeding is amazing and hard. Before I had Sadie, I decided I wouldn’t put pressure on myself to breastfeed if it didn’t work out. It turned out that Sadie didn’t give me a choice (she snubs bottles!), and I’m kind of glad. It has been such a journey and learning curve, but it’s also incredibly special and rewarding.

I have no idea what I’d do without help from Jimmy, our families, and church family.

Showering, getting dressed, and getting out every day does wonders for my sanity. I think Sadie likes the change of scenery, too.

Baby in stroller with cocker spaniel dog walking beside

Some days are productive and others are just… not, lol.

Life will never be the same, and it’s always changing. Some things are becoming easier and some are becoming harder. It will always be that way. What an adventure.

It’s easy to worry about¬†Sadie’s development but I’m going to let her be a baby. I see so many videos, products, posts, etc. about baby development, milestones, and more. I could be teaching her Spanish or¬†taking her to music lessons, but I think a baby should be a baby. She’ll develop just fine whether or not I speak Spanish to her.

Our pets continue to impress us with how they’ve accepted Sadie. Lola is indifferent to her, Mavis loves her, and Malcolm thinks she’s his baby. I can’t wait to see how their relationships develop as Sadie grows.

Cocker spaniel dog and baby laying together

Mom shaming is a thing. I’ve been scolded twice in public for not having a hat on Sadie. Yikes.

Surrender has been my word since having Sadie. I need to surrender my plans, surrender to this new journey, and surrender to all God is doing in my life.

Jimmy is so competent with Sadie.¬†No one soothes Sadie like her daddy does.¬†Jimmy is¬†also amazing at helping me. He comes home after eight or nine hours at work and dives right into family life with us and I couldn’t be more grateful.

Dad with baby girl in nursery

I want to give¬†Sadie the whole world. Of course I know what she needs most is love and to know the Lord, and I don’t want her to become spoiled, but I want to give her the best life possible.

I feel God refining me. He is teaching me patience, selflessness, and surrender. In turn, He has given me the gift of our daughter, joy, and so much thankfulness!