Welcome to my first pregnancy diary post for baby #3! These are a series of posts written throughout my pregnancy that are just stream of consciousness-style writing about the emotional and physical journey through the blessing of carrying our child! This first post was written the day I found out I was expecting, so it’s truly all over the place! Thanks for joining me on this journey 🙂

Tuesday June 25^th, 2024

So… I’m pregnant for the third time! Is this even real life? I was not expecting to be pregnant when I took a test today. I just didn’t really have any inkling that I was expecting except for the fact that I had a weird, bitter taste in my mouth yesterday and today.

This morning, the kids and I went to our favorite place: the creek. It’s a trail near our house with a beautiful creek. We had such a nice morning. Sadie got stung by a bee on her foot yesterday and didn’t want to walk, so she sat in the stroller and held Mordecai on her lap. The weather was perfect (70s and sunny) and the kids were happy just throwing rocks in the water. I felt so content! My heart was full just doing the mom thing with my precious children.

Sadie was in the creek and took a leaf and tore it into pieces and threw it into the water. She said “This piece is mom, this is dad, this piece is me, this piece is Mordecai, and this piece is my baby sister.” Did she have a premonition like she did in the Outer Banks when I was pregnant with Mordecai?! In the Outer Banks in 2022, we went into a store like a day or two before I found out I was expecting Mordecai and she said every baby girl item was for her little sister. I think she always says sister because she has always wanted one 😂

The bitter taste in my mouth was bothering me and I thought, well, I know that *could* be a pregnancy symptom but it just didn’t seem likely. After we got home from the creek, I put the kids in the bath and decided eh, I’ll take a pregnancy test. It was immediately positive. This surprised me because it was the middle of the day and the second line wasn’t faint. I just looked over at the kids happily playing in the bath and was like what?! in my head. I then proceeded to pace around and talk to myself because I just couldn’t believe it. Another child!!

Of course, I needed more confirmation, so I took another test where it would say “pregnant” or “not pregnant” and it said pregnant. Ok!

Once it sunk in, I had so much running through my head. First of all, I feel pretty normal, which worries me. Is the baby okay? I usually get morning sickness around six weeks, so I’m guessing I’m 4 or 5 weeks now. My next thought was the iron infusion I recently had. I took a pregnancy test the morning of the infusion to make sure I wasn’t pregnant because it wasn’t safe to have the infusion during pregnancy. The test was negative and that was in early June. But what if… what if I was really early along at the point? What if the infusion hurt the baby? I guess I won’t have an answer until we can see the baby on an ultrasound or actually meet him/her in nine months and confirm the infusion didn’t impact that baby in any way. I am going to trust God.

My next thought was how am I going to homeschool Sadie while having a toddler and infant?! Also, just in general what will life be like with three kids? When am I due? I would think late March or early April since I usually go to around 41 weeks with my babies. That feels way too soon. I remember Sadie’s pregnancy feeling like it dragged on forever, Mordecai’s went faster, and this one already feels too short!

There are some aspects of pregnancy I’m dreading, like the hernia I always get when I’m pregnant that disappears when I deliver and the body comments from those around me. But I am so excited to feel another baby kick inside of me! I can’t wait to meet this child. And hopefully breastfeed like I have with Mordecai and Sadie. What will the birth be like? Mordecai’s birth was a little rocky with him having shoulder dystocia, so I’m curious how things will go this time. I plan on delivering with the birth center and midwives again as long as I’m able to.

I just can’t believe this is real. Do we really get to be blessed with three children? Three kids will change a lot for us, mainly our car situation and possibly our house situation. Jimmy has always thought that if we have more kids, we should move out of our 900 square foot house. But I love our home and think three (very small) bedrooms are enough. Two of the kids can room together somehow, and the baby will be in our room for quite a while, too.

I thought about the baking I’ve been doing lately, too. Things have been busy and having another child will definitely changes the dynamics, which is fine. Therapy work with Niva may look a bit different, too. I’m excited to get to reuse either Sadie or Mordecai’s clothes!

I’m very curious what the kids will think. I’m sure Sadie will be over the moon. I am excited to see her be a big sister again, especially because she will be six or even six and a half when the baby is born. What will Mordecai think? Decky will be two-years-old when the baby is born. What will this baby be like? What will their personality be?!

I decided to tell Jimmy when he got home from work. I put the positive test in an empty amazon package and told him something came for him from Amazon.

He was just as shocked as I was! We weren’t trying to conceive and we had such a struggle conceiving Mordecai. I feel… underserving of this baby. Now that I know I’m pregnant, I’m overjoyed and excited for this child. We will always welcome pregnancies and children whether they are planned or not. Children are a blessing!

I’m still in shock. Happy shock. We went out to see Jimmy’s step sister at work and I was walking across the parking lot and thinking I have a human growing inside of me. How special is that? On first thought, I think the baby is a boy. I don’t really know why, but I just do?! We don’t have a gender preference. We are just happy to have this child and hopefully meet him or her in nine months. I have loved having a girl and I have loved having a boy.

Sorry this post is all over the place. I’m truly writing it live, the day I found out and this is basically my stream of consciousness. Thanks for bearing with me.

The next step for me is to find out how far along I am! I’ll be back soon. I’m excited and nervous and feeling really, really blessed.

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If you stuck through to the end of this post, you read over 1,200 words about me finding out I was pregnant and basically my mind running in circles as I typed, so thanks for staying with me! Be on the lookout for the next post about trying to figure out how far along I was and telling my mom the big news 😬