Being alone

I spent most of Saturday completely alone.

(My parents and sister were at an out-of-state track meet and Jimmy was fishing with his dad and brother.)

I’ve always liked to be alone, even since I was a little girl. My family would watch a movie in our living room and I would run off to my bedroom to play with my doll house. When I’m with large groups of people I do fine, but I prefer hanging out with people one-on-one.

Because of Facebook, Twitter, and other social media outlets, we’re made to believe that we always have to be connected and have a lot of friends to be acceptable and enjoyable in life. I have always struggled with this.

I have always thought “Why do I like being alone?” “Am I a freak because I don’t like going to huge gatherings all the time?” “Is it bad that I only have a handful of good friends?”

I’ve come to realize that everyone is different and it’s a-okay for me to enjoy being alone. I wasn’t always secure in that statement! I used to go places with someone all the time. If I wanted to go to the library I would ask my sister to come. Shopping? I’d call up my best friend.

Since I’ve realized that I’m not a “freak” because I’m introverted, I have no problem shopping alone, seeing a movie, or having lunch by myself. Learning about who I am and accepting myself as I am is an ongoing, lifelong process, but I just thought I’d share my little realization with you 🙂

Do you prefer to spend time alone or do you like to be with people all the time?


  1. Since I’m an only child, I’m the sammmeee way! I really enjoy having “me time” even though it is always nice to do stuff with family or friends too 🙂

  2. I consider myself an extrovert (and that’s pretty much right, according to most everyone I know and every online test I’ve taken), but I still like spending time alone. Liking spending time alone doesn’t make you an introvert- introvert/extrovert is more about how you “recharge” and get energized, whether that’s alone or with others. Plus, you have siblings, family, Jimmy, school, so you’re around people a lot, always nice to have a day to recharge!

    On another note, I really hate when people don’t want to go places, like shopping, to the gym, library, dinner, etc, alone. I wouldn’t want to go to those places alone all the time, but I know some people who refuse to even go some places alone- I think it’s more of a matter of independence…

  3. I don’t mind being alone either! I actually really enjoy it and even look forward to it sometimes! Its just a time to relax and be with my own thoughts. I love my ‘me time’.

  4. No shame in the introversion game my dear! You know I relate! I need my alone time to keep myself from getting overwhelmed. As others have said above me, it helps me recharge and calm down. Interacting with others is something I really love, but it tires me out physically and mentally.

    You know it’s interesting what you said about being “connected” via social media. I wonder how much our generation actually “interacts” anymore versus relying on those forms of communication. When I walk around campus, I see so many people talking on their phone or texting, but much fewer actually talking to one another.

  5. I actually have been thinking about this so much recently. I have come to understand that I’m an introvert and I just simply like my alone time, and there’s no shame in that. I actually just went into D.C. by myself this weekend! I truly feel comfortable being by myself now, rather than spending that time questioning why I like having alone time.

  6. I am a fellow introvert, so I can totally relate! It wasn’t until I picked up an introvert book (well, until My Mom described introversion to me in high school) that I realized that there were others (about 1/3 of the population), who digested information and interacted socially in the SAME WAY as I do, that I began to feel comfortable with this part of my personality. For a long time I would feel badly about myself- wondering why my energy was low, wondering why I didn’t want to be social (in the same ways as others- large groups, lots of stimuli, etc.) , and wondering why it was simply JUST SO HARD for me to keep going all day with social interactions the way others are able to. Have you seen this TED talk too btw?

    This is it in article-form:

    I’ve posted them on my blog and facebook though- they may already be familiar to you!

  7. Oh, I am SUCH a hermit! And yeah, I used to think something was wrong, and I tried to force myself to like spending lots of time with people. But hey, I just don’t. I value my alone time, and I think I’m more independent because of it! Took awhile to realize it’s a-okay to be me, and now I can spend an evening curled up with a good book and a mug of tea and do it social-guilt-free!

  8. Alone — but as a Mom, I’d rather be with my children (grown or not!) I def spend most of my days alone (me n my best friend QB (quick books :/ ) and I love it… I dislike crowds, parties, and the awkwardness of having to answer questions about myself… So ya, you get your weirdness from your Madre, cuz as you know, your Dad, bro & sis are quite the opposite 🙂

  9. I think everyone needs some alone time from time to time….nothing wrong with that. It gives you a change to think about things and learn about yourself. I have been going through a “hermit” stage lately and it has helped me figure out a lot of things that I was worried about.

  10. I agree. I sometimes prefer to be alone, rather than doing something I’m not 100% into with random friends. I don’t mind being home alone, running alone, or shopping alone. Sometimes it’s more liberating that way! 😉

  11. Oh I love this post! I’d say most of my free time I would much rather be alone. I get terribly stressed and exhausted at large group situations. I frequently tell my live-in boyfriend that he needs to give me my “anti-social” time. It took me a really long time to understand this about myself, but once I figured it out, I forgave myself and was nice to myself about it. Though it took many years of struggling and hating myself a little for it. I first really thought of myself as an introvert after reading a Gliding Calm post ( ). It does seem to be that a lot of my friends (in the bloggersphere or otherwise) are as well. We’re in good company!

    ps. I have that same sweatshirt and I’ve almost worn it out already 🙂 I like it with the blue shorts!

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