As a Christian, I base my beliefs on the Bible. It is my guidebook for life, and I try to follow God’s Word as best I can. When deciding how I will act or live, I look to the Bible first to see what it says about a certain subject or issue.
I’ve gone to a nonĀ denominationalĀ ChristianĀ church since I was two years old, so I’ve always had certain morals and values instilled in me. As I’ve grown up, it has been up to me to decide whether or not I will continue to agree with those morals and values.
Every summer since I was eight-years-old until I was 18-years-old, I have went to church camp for a week. In 2008, I was at camp and in class when the topic of sexual purity came up. The teacher discussed some Bible verses that made sense to me.
For the grace of God that brings salvation…teaches us to say āNoā to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age. (Titus 2:11-12)
But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity…because these are improper for Godās holy people. Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place. (Ephesians 5:3-4)
I got to thinking about how it makes sense for me, as a Christian, to waitĀ until I am married to have sex or partake in any sexual acts. This is what my faith believes so it is what I practice. When I got home from camp that week, I bought a purity ring and signed a contract agreeing not to have sex before I am married.
So basically, my purity ring is a reminder to myself and a promise to God that I will keep myself pure for Him, myself, my future family, and future husband.
The Bible tells us thatĀ God wants us to keep our bodies Holy and clean because He created us. I don’t think he would want me having sex with a lot of men (or even just one), before I’ve completely committed my sexual life to someone.
A woman is a giftĀ to her husband and I want to give my future husband (who ever he is … cough*ihopeitisjimmy*cough) my purity.
I know I won’t regret waiting; I haven’t regretted it so far.
How my choice has impacted my life
-When a someone asks what my ring says and I tell them, it changes things. Some people are respectful, and some aren’t.
-The people that don’t respect me are mostly curious and/or crack jokes.
-It makes me excited for my future. I will be going into marriage without sexual baggage.
My ring says “True Love Waits” I like that saying because I think it’s true. If a guy loves me, he will wait to have a sexual relationship with me until we’re married.
How my purity ring affects mine and Jim’s relationship
-Jim alsoĀ wears a purity ring, so that makes both of our lives so much easier. We met at church and have the same beliefs. God absolutely answered my prayers with Jim. The fact that we’re on the same page regarding such a sensitive and important topic is wonderful.
-Not havingĀ a sexual relationship has made our relationship simple.
-We don’t worry about me becoming pregnant, andĀ we don’tĀ awkwardlyĀ get caught making out because we don’t make out.
-We don’t argue about anything sex-related, and we don’t have any diseases because we have both saved our purity for our future spouses.
-We can focus on different things in our relationship. We have fun without drinking, doing drugs, or having sex.
-WeĀ strengthenĀ each other’s faith and we are both able to focus in our lives and especially our faith.
Well that is all I have to say for now.
If this didn’t offend anyone or sound too personal maybe I’ll write a post on theĀ number one question I get from my peers… How doĀ Jim and I notĀ have sex? And/orĀ is it horrible?
So that is a possibility for another post, we’ll see. I could even have Jim do a guest post on this topic. I hope I don’t sound “preachy” but I thought I should share a big part of my life with all my blogging buddies.
Edited to add: Two years after creating this post, I decided to do a question and answer post on purity rings. It can be found here.
Living My Full Life 
Wow, I think that’s great. I’m pretty impressed there isn’t any kissing :).
Good for both of you for doing what you believe in.
Gah, I love this. I think it just makes sense too! Our purity is the one thing we can never get back, and in my opinion “doing it” with someone should be special and sacred, not just something for fun with any guy you go out with. And even if someone has sex before they get married, I don’t think teenagers should at all! I mean, we have the rest of our lives. Why not hang on to our innocence for a while more? I hate that it is the norm for high schoolers (or middle schoolers or collegers) to be sexually active. Like, what?! I am weird for being a virgin at 16?!
You are not weird at all for being a virgin @ 16 š You are awesome and special and AMAZING š
haha thank you, I can’t believe some high schoolers though that I have heard SAY people who are still virgins are weird… that is so messed up I couldn’t believe my ears!
LOVE this!! I don’t wear a purity ring (I just haven’t ever gotten one..i’d love one though!), but I still believe in EVERYTHING you said. I know waiting is the BEST thing to do, and I love knowing that if my boyfriend and I get married someday, that we will have saved ourselves for each other ā¤ Love the verses too..it's clear that God believes in abstinence š
Thankyou for sharing ‘your story’ with us š
Way to stand up for your beliefs – that can’t always be easy. Obviously you two love each other and God a lot to uphold such an impressive committment. Thanks for sharing your beliefs!
I think it takes a really strong person to hold so true to their beliefs. You are awesome for that!
This is one of my favorite posts you’ve EVER done! It’s so personal and just wonderful š I totally agree with your views, it feels great to not have to worry about any STD’s or problems before marraige. Some think purity rings are weird, but I’m a fan like you!
I’m sooooo glad you and Jim found each other, God has really blessed you two lovebirds heehee!
Aww, thank you for the LOVELY comment š LOVE YOU GIRL!!
God REALLY has blessed Jim and I š I am soo glad I have blogging friends like you who understand me and also agree with my beliefs ! <333
Allie, thanks for writing this. This is beautiful. Don’t let anyone tell you that you won’t know what to do on your wedding night. For one thing, you will get TONS of advice from all your married friends as soon as you get engaged. I’m not sure what it is about the official ring on your finger, but all the sudden, all your friends will get very chatty Cathy about their first time and how things change and what to expect (I was really shocked by some of my more reserved friends opening up about sex the day after I got engaged, haha).
And for another thing, if you end up marrying a guy who isn’t a virgin then he’s the person you trust enough to marry and that means he’s definitely going to be patient and understanding and sweet. And if he is a virgin – he won’t have a clue either. š So you get to learn together.
Also on this purity note… I pledged myself to purity when I was 13. I wrote a letter to my future husband explaining to him why I had chosen to commit to purity. Over the years I wrote dozens of love letters to my “Dear Future Husband” until the night before my wedding when I wrote my final “future husband” letter and addressed it specifically to Christopher. On our honeymoon I presented him with this box of letters that I’d been writing for 8 years and it was a really sweet moment. There in front of him he had years of proof of my commitment to wait for him. Allie, it is worth the wait. Christopher and I are both so glad that we waited. š
Okay now I’m done writing a book in your comments, haha!
Ahhhh, how cool is that!? I’m definitely going to write letters to “my future husband.” š
I LOVE this comment! Love YOU!
Thank you so much for writing a ‘book’ in my comments š
I hope I will have good friends like you had who will help me when I am engaged ;). It is SO sweet that you wrote letters to your future husband before you knew him. That is SO special š
Love ya!
I agree! You go girl!
I think I want to be a born-again virgin in my next relationship.
I even lived with my boyfriends and the more I draw closer to God I feel like it may be the right thing to just wait….like it’s been done for centuries.
But wait, no kissing? Really? I didn’t think that was part of it until I read another comment. Surely ya’ll kiss and hug? Maybe? I am going to hush now because I feel weird.
I love this post. I love your willingness to share.
SO AWESOME! I loved reading every bit of this. š I would love to hear Jim’s thoughts about your pure relationship!
I pray every night for my future husband, whoever he is! That he’s making good choices and growing in God’s love!
I love the post and I am seriously impressed by your strong opinions!! I think it is fabulous that you and your boyfriedn BOTH wear those rings and feel the same about this quite an important subject. I agree that not having sex makes a relationship more special and even more intimate in kind a way. It let you get to know each other better on the spiritual level and I think the “first night” makes you feel much closer when you are able to wait despite some comments and funny faces that people may give you.
You are great, girl!
I love that you do you and stand by your decisions and beliefs. It’s SUCH an admirable and noble trait!
As for those who judge…haters gon’ hate!
I think it’s fantastic that you and Jimmy are respecting your beliefs and doing what is best for you two in your relationship!
Allie-
I am so glad you were directed by God to make this choice at eight. It’s a decision you will never regret! I pray for my sons to remain pure until they meet their wives, and that they too will be pure with a desire to honor the Lord. So much damage can enter into a marriage from trying to enjoy the gift of sex before it’s time and out of context.
…on that same note…Anyone who has been ROBBED of their purity, through abuse, has nothing to be ashamed of. Please find safety.
Allie, thank you for sharing your personal life with us. Jimmy sounds like a nice guy and you guys are great following your belief. I miss those simple moments… now with the kids and all it’s just hard to feel that way. So enjoy now. There will be plenty of times to enjoy different things in the near future.
Wow. What a great post. Seriously. I can only hope that someday my daughter will have these same strong convictions and not be swayed by peer pressure. Do me a favor…can you ask your parents what advice they would give to a mom who wants to raise her daughter just like you???
I think it’s great that you wear a purity ring. Whether anyone is religious or not, they should not have sex before marriage or at least they know they are fully committed to one person. I’m not one for marriage so I believe that I should 100% know if I am going to be with someone for the rest of my life. If only more people followed the purity ring ‘rules’ or whatever you want to call them and the world would be a better place.
Hola! Awesome post. I support your opinions and beliefs. Its wonderful that you found someone who shares them with you, trust me thats really hard to do!
i LOVE this post. You are JImmy are adorbs together and because of all this you guys will be so much strong in the future. I support your beliefs big time and I agree I do feel like people would respect you more. You rock girl!!
Dear Allie,
Thank you so much for this post. I don’t know you, but you have really helped me. You (and all the “commenters”) have given me hope that I am not the only one who has made this decision. I know it’s not easy to wait, but I truly believe it is the best choice. Once again, thank you. I sincerely wish you and Jim all the best.
One question: What do you think of someone who is waiting dating someone who has not waited in the past, but is willing to respect my decision?
Love, D.M.
Dana,
You are So welcome for this post! I am so very happy that God has let me help you-even if we don’t know each other. You are not the only one out there who has made this important (not to mention AWESOME) decision. It isn’t easy to wait but we know it will be worth it in the end. Thanks for the comment! To answer your question, I think it is perfectly fine to date someone who hasn’t waited. God forgives!
If you ever want to talk, shoot me an email!!
-Allie
I think this post in fantastic. You & I may not have the same beliefs, but I have TOTAL respect for people who stand by their beliefs, since everyone should. š It can’t be easy as a teenager to make such a mature choice and I think that is aweeeesome.
I made the commitment to save myself when I was a teenager, too. Only it didn’t work out so well… I just wanted to tell you that you have made the right choice and that the only thing you are missing is heartbreak and loneliness by choosing to wait… If I could take back that ONE night, I really think my life would have been a lot different. But I am very happy that God has led me to a man who understands me just the way I am, mistakes and all…
Anyway, Thank you for your post. And don’t worry about your wedding night. Number one, you’ve got awhile… Number two, God made it to be special and He made our bodies to know what to do and when to do them! =)
Keep up the encouragement to all of us out here!!
Thank you so much for your comment!!! š